The Eight Stages Of Debt And Financial Death
Keywords: credit, debt
In 1969, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross described the five stages that people pass through when dealing with grief and tragedy. These stages are typically thought of as only existing under the banner of death and dying but the loss of your financial position and social status can also bring great grief and similar emotions. I’ve modified her original five stages and added the additional stages of a financial death to create an emotional roadmap of financial death.
Denial - The “This can’t be real” stage. Often evidenced by feelings like “I can’t be behind on my bills, you must be mistaken” or “The payment can’t be late.”
Anger - The “Why me?” stage. Often this is evidenced by statements like “I’ve always paid my bills on time, how dare you pursue me for payment” or “I resent the fact you are a debt collector and contacting me for payment.”
Bargaining - The “If I do this, you’ll do that” stage. “If you give me just one more week I’ll have all the money together.” “If you let me keep the car I’ll pay you twice what it is worth in a year.”
Depression - The “Defeated” stage. “I’ve shamed my family and am not worthy to live.” “I am a failure and can’t face these financial problems.” “I’m ashamed and don’t want to tell anyone.”
Acceptance - The “This is going to happen” stage. The stage at which healing can begin to occur and the individual understands what can and must be done and it unable to continue to struggle anymore. Unless we can reach this stage there is not much hope of being able to return a healthy person to society and leave them in a position where they will be productive members again. They will otherwise be left emotional damaged and not whole.
Financial Death - The “It’s over” stage. That lowest most point at which the financial situation is so bad that it results in loss and often judicial intervention.
Resurrection - The “Time to move forward” stage. Every person that can pass entirely through the financial death stage can proceed to resurrect their new financial life from the ashes of their old one.
Rebirth - The “I’m doing better now” stage. After successfully passing through the stages of financial death a new financial life can open before the individual and allow them to rebuild their life.
Not all people pass neatly through all of the stages and the first five are not experienced in any neat order but people that live through a financial crisis do experience the majority of these stages.
Those of us that assist people with financial troubles will recognise the transition through these stages and understand that when consumers are in financial pain, they often lash out at those around them. It is just a normal and natural emotional function of the financial death process.
Steve Rhode is the chairman of the not-for-profit social enterprise, Myvesta UK. Myvesta UK provides free and anonymous assistance to people with financial problems and worries who need help with an IVA, debt assistance, or just friendly advice. myvesta.org.uk
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